I feel this is the perfect poem to start with. I had it in mind as I created this blog, so I have to put it up first. I wrote this poem back in High School, so it may be slightly juvenile, but still deep. I was a very social introvert, if you understand that.
Expression
What can you say when words can't explain;
Could you describe the glory, the pain?
When the failure of language cannot comprehend,
Could expression describe the message to send?
An expression will often fall short or mislead,
So how could one tell which message to read?
No bodily motion could ever achieve,
The feelings your heart aches to relieve.
If expression and words don't reach their design
And communication will choose to confine,
Don't attempt to express what you cannot say
For deep inside these emotions must stay.
~Tricia Foster 2003
I wrote this poem almost eight years following, and really as a response to, the previous poem, "Expression." This poem is about how I communicate emotion through singing. It's not about the words I sing, just pure emotional expression.
And Then One Day I Sang A Song
And then one day I sang a song
When it rose and fell, it brought me along
I felt its pain, touched its sorrow
It gave me something I had to borrow.
It gave me new voice; It gave me a choice;
It gave me a way to cry out and rejoice.
For a few moments I borrowed its power.
For a few moments I basked in this shower.
I could express! I could tell my story!
I could express through my voice my soul’s utmost glory!
For years before
I had used my voice
Picking each word
And hating each choice.
In different words, through a different façade,
I told the world how I felt about God.
I told the world how I felt about me.
I told the world what I wish'd there could be.
I finally cried about my broken heart.
I finally screamed about my unseen part.
I couldn’t contain this explosion within!
I didn’t have to--I didn't have to hold it in!
So I let it out! I just let it soar out!
I opened my mouth and let my whole heart out!
And my entire being sighed, and released.
It completely let go all that aching and grief.
And I felt lighter, and brighter, and firm and free.
I no longer cared what happened to me.
Because I felt peace. I calmed my sea.
For once I saw what I never could see.
That I can be healed--but I have to allow it.
Being tough’s not the way to go about it.
Holding it in didn't make me a saint,
Nor make me feel strong--it made me feel feint.
I became over-full, and when bumped, I spilled over
I struggled with balance, and soon- turned colder.
So I finished my song,
And I looked at my soul,
And I knew I was new,
I knew I was strong.
So I'll sing out my hurts, whenever I need
They accumulate quickly, but I can proceed.
For I have found a way to truly express;
There is a way to completely address
My own confusion, my love, and my pain.
No longer expression can I ever blame.
~Tricia Foster December 2010
I wrote this poem (I call it that even though it has no rhyming or lining pattern), while listening to the song "The Heart Asks Pleasure First", which is the first song that plays when you come to this blog.
Feeling the Music
I listened to that song again
And it reminded me of another.
No similar phrases- nor, truthfully, anything akin to each other;
And perhaps I am the only one who would connect them,
But they both evoked within me that which made me feel… transcendent.
And it’s not only those two pieces of music—for there have been a number of them.
These songs knew me- and I them. And we belonged to each other.
You have felt it- in your own, unique way.
Music is felt and heard by everyone in such an individual manner;
Each heart beats its own melody in such an intimate way.
Play in your mind a song that touched you, and try to understand.
You hear a song which shatters your barriers and captures your soul.
Surrender your body, your mind, and your existence to this moment.
Let it pierce your soul and stir in your heart such emotion as to render you unable to move.
As if taken over, the flesh loosens and completely releases its hold on your spirit.
Your mortal eyes close and you are transported.
As you listen to the music, the notes and melody rise and swell.
You arrive at a place of complete peace and tranquility
You feel the movement and the warmth of the air around you
You see the colors of the scene before you
And you sense that this place is yours.
This is your haven- you know it, and you have been here before.
It is real. It is you.
Everything you see has a soul which speaks to you.
This is where the language of your heart is learnt.
This is where the pain of your life is healed, where the joys of your life are bound.
Here you can’t help but cry. And here you can’t resist a smile.
Here your soul is larger than your body and your heart pushes more than just blood.
Here you are connected to all that is greater than you.
This is where you can truly FEEL.
And you feel so passionately about this moment, that you cannot bear to leave.
You want to be here for all eternity.
And perhaps one day- you will.
Perhaps your soul is connected so indelibly with this place because it is truly its home.
Perhaps this is where you came from,
And perhaps this is where you are going.
That is the journey these songs take me on.
A handful of songs can connect me to that place.
Other songs evoke other emotions, and some bring back painful or lovely memories,
But these ones I cherish. These ones are mine.
~Tricia Foster October 2011
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